Obstacles do not block the path, they are the path – Zen Proverb

We know the phrase “Path of Least Resistance” but do you know if you are suppose to choose it or avoid it? The initial response is to avoid. We are trained to go the opposite direction when we meet resistance. When a door won’t open, a jar lid won’t budge or a screw won’t loosen we know to go the other direction. The same is true of our interactions with people. If you give a smile and receive none in return we shy away versus engage in conversation.  But, what if taking the path of least resistance is the wrong choice. What if the path of least resistance is keeping you prisoner to your own fears, limiting your success and not helping you fulfill your dreams.

Take the example above where you smile at someone and receive nothing in return. The automatic response is not engage in conversation with that person. Did the person not smile because they don’t like you? Likely not. They might not even know you. Perhaps the lack of response is due to their own fears and insecurities. Or, you caught them so off guard with your smile they were processing whether you were smiling at them or someone else. The list could be endless. If you choose the path of least resistance you turn away and miss an opportunity. However, because you received no response in return you internalize it, you make it personal, you take the path of least resistance instead of the path of opportunity.

It is so easy in today’s world with all of the electronic distractions and everyone buried in their phones to miss a great conversation. Nobody looks up anymore to engage in conversation. A 30 second wait in line is torture. The world could be falling apart at their feet if they don’t check facebook. As a result people don’t even notice a neighbor in line behind them. So, take advantage of those moments where you do make eye contact, smile and say hello or offer some other line of conversation. The same can be applied on a much bigger scale if you are considering a major change in life, at a networking event or a college student hoping to land your first job. Nobody has ever suffered immediate death from the act of saying hello. Maybe profuse perspiration and increased heart rate but those are only temporary side effects and will pass.

I am finding more and more that I am engaged in conversations with people about the work they do and their desire for something different. Something outside of what they normally do, something that feeds their passion and excites them. But, as it goes with making a major shift there is also a resistance to making such a big change because we are so well trained to follow the path of least resistance.

Here is the problem with stopping when we meet resistance if we are trying to implement change in our life . Stopping requires very little from us, we learn very little about ourselves and very little changes. Unlike the door, the jar, the screw or even the stranger the resistance is not put there by something outside of our control. It is put there by ourselves. We create the resistance because we fear the change, we fear the unknown and, most of all, we fear failure.  However, if we were to place the same amount of energy believing in ourselves as we did in our fears we would be unstoppable.

So the next time you feel resistance within yourself do not shy away from it.  Stop, become aware of it, ask why YOU are placing that resistance in your own path, what you will gain by moving through it and what will happen if you back away from it. If you feel resistance from those around you to what feels right within you do not let it deter you. Do not get angry at those around you for the resistance and see it as being for your benefit because it affirms your desires.  And, do not let your insecurities take over because of a little resistance being placed in your way. These tests will come along to see how committed you are to what is true to you and what you want. Just like an obstacle in a hiking path you must navigate around to keep moving on in to your destination.

Backing away from resistance might feel good initially but it will feel uncomfortable in the long run because intuitively you know it was the path you were meant to take, the hello you should have said, the yes instead of the no. Because if you continue to shy away from resistance your life will be replaced with regrets where resistance left off.  Choose the path that makes you feel a little uncomfortable, requires a little more from you, and excites you. Choose the path that makes you feel alive again and feeds your soul. As you get comfortable with taking that path you will find you fears lessen and those paths aren’t so difficult after all. The resistance within you lessens. And, who knows who you might meet with a simple hello along the way.