Sparking Joy With New Perspective

Many moons ago I remember asking a guy I liked, “What do you want five years from now?” 
His response was, “To have you in my life.” 

My heart, of course, skipped a beat, my stomach flipped, and I was caught by surprise. He had been playing it “close to the vest” as they say. Me- not certain of his feelings – wondering if I should cut my losses and bail.

How far apart were my “thoughts” versus his truth. Huge. Just by me asking my perspective changed in a second. Then 5 minutes, hours, days, months, years. 


So my friend, “What do you want 5 years from now?”. If you do not know- no worries. Don’t stop asking, searching, inquiring. As one moves through life it is easy to get caught up in all the “responsibility” and forget to ask, “What do I want”? To defer to another, say it doesn’t matter, or the classic “Whatever you want.”.


While choosing where to eat and letting someone else pick is relatively small – the “I don’t know,” “I don’t care,” and “It isn’t important” responses add up. Next thing you know the 5 seconds, 5 minutes, 5 months, 5 years have ticked past and you aren’t actively participating in your life. Not consciously that is.  What then? What happens to the thing called JOY. I have found that many people move from knowing what they want in life, to not. They move into believing they don’t know what it is that SPARKS JOY.  My friend…if this is you

You do know what sparks JOY  Just like any seldom used muscle- you need to start practicing, warm it up, and rediscover your strength.  How?  Oh- the million $ question.  I have been there myself.  

  • First- like I did with my husband & as my former coach did with me- ASK. 
  • Next, be okay with the unknowing and trust that the answer is there.
    • Much like a treasure that has been buried, you must brush away the dust. 
  • Then what? Keep asking
    • Asking and exploring.

When I left my career of 23 years and started my own business I didn’t fully know where it was taking me. I still don’t. But I kept asking myself “What do I want?” Not my husband, kids, or the part of me that likes to make everyone happy.

I ask the most important person (and the only one with the answer)ME.  

So, my friend.

What do you want?  YOU.  

Pick something and try it. See if it lights a spark. I started drawing, then watercolors & now I paint on huge canvases. Perhaps you collect pet rocks, then make rock gardens, and next thing you know you have an epic zen rock garden.  

Still stuck- try the small things. Pick dinner, a movie, or a family show. Take a different route when walking your dog. Minor changes to the normal routine will help to uncover something new.  Maybe you have to go out way into the future 15 years- or 50. The farther out the easier it might feel. But once you ask and get an answer you can start crafting your life in that direction. It doesn’t mean your course of A to B is set. You will likely make modifications along the way. But if you ask, “Is this in alignment with where I want to be?” You’re sure to be on the right path.  It all starts with asking.

Then capture it in writing, images, or vision boards.

People are more likely to accomplish their goals when they write them down. So, what of that guy I liked? We have been married 16 years. Always easy? No. But I keep asking, “What do you want 5 years from now”. 

With Gratitude – Robina


Need help defining what sparks joy in your life or how to pursue it? I created the Soul~Self~Wealth Guidebook (Goal-setting Reimagined) just for people like you. Learn more here